I have always believed perfectionism was a good thing and that we must strive to be perfect in everything we do. I have discovered that perfection is not attainable and that no one is perfect (except for our Creator). Life can be very frustrating for a perfectionist. I know, because I am a recovering perfectionist. Before, I wanted my life to be perfect, but now, my goal is to be happy. I continue to learn to be the best I can be and achieve what I can at the highest level possible (excellence) which is good enough for me! Psychologist Thomas Greenspon quoted the following differences between excellence and perfectionism in his book, “Moving Past Perfect:”
- “Excellence is risk. Perfection is fear.
- Excellence is effort. Perfection is anger and frustration.
- Excellence is openness to being wrong. Perfection is having to be right.
- Excellence is spontaneity. Perfection is control.
- Excellence is flow. Perfectionism is pressure.
- Excellence is confidence. Perfectionism is doubt.
- Excellence is a journey. Perfectionism is destination.
- Excellence is acceptance. Perfectionism is judgement.
- Excellence is encouraging. Perfection is criticizing.”
Here are a few more to consider that I’ve read elsewhere:
- Excellence is surrender. Perfectionism is consuming.
- Excellence is trust. Perfection is selfishness.
Dr. Greenspon also stated, “Perfectionism does not determine success — talent, energy, and commitment do. Perfectionists are successful despite their perfectionism — not because of it.”
Words have power. Be careful when you speak or write the word ‘trying.’ The definition I am referring to is: “make an effort to do something: to attempt to accomplish or complete something” (from Merriam-Webster.com). When you truly want to accomplish something, you have to eliminate the word ‘trying’ because the universe delivers exactly what you state. You will continue to try or attempt to instead of actually achieve the goal. Be aware of the words you use. You will get quicker and better results when you are more specific and direct with the universe. And of course, always use the powerful words ‘I am.’ See the following examples:
- I am trying to follow biblical principles. ► I am following biblical principles.
- I am trying to practice humility in my daily life. ► I am practicing humility in my daily life.
What is important to you in life? Is it being famous, owning a big house and a fancy new car, or maybe having a large family? Are there specific goals you would like to achieve such as writing a book, earning a college degree, owning a successful business, weighing a certain amount, etc.? Many of us have met our goals. Are you satisfied, or are you ready to tackle another one? Some of us create bucket lists of things that we feel the need to do before the end of life. People are jumping out of airplanes, surfing 10-foot waves, skiing from the highest mountaintops, etc. Do these things satisfy the ego or the spirit? The #1 goal on everyone’s list should be self-improvement, because then everything else will fall into place. I can honestly say there is nothing more fulfilling and gratifying in life than improving yourself mentally and spiritually and helping others do the same. You will have such a peace within and clearly understand that the things in life you didn’t accomplish won’t really matter.
To achieve perfect life balance, your inner parts must work well together and stay in sync:
your spirit with your heart,
your heart with your mind,
your mind with your brain,
your brain with your body.
Believe in yourself; believe you are beautiful inside and out; believe you are good enough; believe all good things are happening for you; believe the universe is working to give you what you want; believe you are capable of achieving greatness in your wonderful life; believe there is goodness in everyone.
Are you just existing in life? Are you always having an ordinary, mundane, routine kind of day? What is holding you back from achieving your desires? I am here to tell you that you exist in this world to make a difference. Take control of your life right now and live it to your fullest potential. It’s about time to praise and celebrate life!