Tag Archives: anger

Feeling Emotional

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When will it stop?  We weren’t created to kill each other.  Put your guns away.  It’s not the other person to blame.  We need to overcome the war that’s going on within each of us; the fear, the rage, the anger, and the negativity.  That’s when we will have a peaceful nation.

Feelings vs. Emotions

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I never knew there was a difference between feelings and emotions.  I always thought they were the same.  According to Philosopher, John Voris, there is a distinction.

“Learning the difference between feelings and emotions is crucial in understanding ourselves and initiating personal long-term change. Experts in many fields of behavior agree that our deep feelings come from an unchanging belief about life that holds our identity together, while our emotions are purely physically based, subject to change and are basically reactions to life events.

Your sense of life is an emotional form, in which your world experience finds value, your reason for existence and defines your relationship with other things that exists. Emotions are an abstract, metaphysical state of mind; they are essential impressions of the world, and your relationship with it. Emotions establish your attitude toward reality, and provides your drive for all of life’s pleasures. Additionally, these emotions are connected to your biological systems, and are designed to alert you of danger, or to draw you to something pleasurable. Finally, emotions are intense but temporary. To have them be any other way would be far too stressful on your body! The constant stress would eventually lead to some very serious physical, and mental ailments.

Feelings are products of emotions. But unlike short term, intense emotions, feelings are: low-key, stable and sustained over time.

Here are the differences in a nutshell:

Feelings:
Emotions:
Feelings tell us “how to live.”
Emotions tell us what we “like” and “dislike.”
Feelings state: ”There is a right and wrong way to be.
Emotions state: ”There are good and bad actions.”
Feelings state: “Your emotions matter.”
Emotions state: ”The external world matters.”
Feelings establish our long term attitude toward reality.
Emotions establish our initial attitude toward reality.
Feelings alert us to anticipated dangers and prepares us for action.
Emotion alert us to immediate dangers and prepares us for action
Feelings ensure long-term survival of self. (body and mind.)
Emotions ensure immediate survival of self. (body and mind.)
Feelings are Low-key but Sustainable.
Emotions are Intense but Temporary.
Happiness: is a feeling.
Joy: is an emotion.
Worry: is a feeling.
Fear: is an emotion.
Contentment: is a feeling.
Enthusiasm: is an emotion.
Bitterness: is a feeling.
Anger: is an emotion.
Love: is a feeling.
Lust: is an emotion.
Depression: is a feeling.
Sadness: is an emotion.

So, why should you be concerned with the difference between emotions and feelings anyway? Because the way you behave in this world, is the end result of your feelings and emotions.  Learning the difference can provide you with a better understanding of not only yourself, but of the people around you.”

For additional information, go to: Authentic Systems, Motivation Research & Development @ http://authentic-systems.com/difference-between-emotions-and-feelings/ and http://johnvoris.com/featured-articles/difference-between-emotions-and-feelings/.

Excellence vs. Perfection

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I have always believed perfectionism was a good thing and that we must strive to be perfect in everything we do. I have discovered that perfection is not attainable and that no one is perfect (except for our Creator). Life can be very frustrating for a perfectionist. I know, because I am a recovering perfectionist. Before, I wanted my life to be perfect, but now, my goal is to be happy. I continue to learn to be the best I can be and achieve what I can at the highest level possible (excellence) which is good enough for me!  Psychologist Thomas Greenspon quoted the following differences between excellence and perfectionism in his book, “Moving Past Perfect:

  • “Excellence is risk. Perfection is fear.
  • Excellence is effort. Perfection is anger and frustration.
  • Excellence is openness to being wrong. Perfection is having to be right.
  • Excellence is spontaneity. Perfection is control.
  • Excellence is flow. Perfectionism is pressure.
  • Excellence is confidence. Perfectionism is doubt.
  • Excellence is a journey. Perfectionism is destination.
  • Excellence is acceptance. Perfectionism is judgement.
  • Excellence is encouraging. Perfection is criticizing.”

Here are a few more to consider that I’ve read elsewhere:

  • Excellence is surrender. Perfectionism is consuming.
  • Excellence is trust. Perfection is selfishness.

Dr. Greenspon also stated, “Perfectionism does not determine success — talent, energy, and commitment do.  Perfectionists are successful despite their perfectionism — not because of it.”